i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
There now exists video of me holding a (recently emptied) bottle of Russian Standard vodka, trying to sing the Russian national anthem.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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