When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
That accounts for only three of the penises
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
The power of my boobs compel you
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
