Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
While I was dancing with him in my foil dress he said, "You're like a Chipotle burrito. Don't worry, that's the best complement you could get from me."
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
No subtext here. People are naked.
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
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