420 ftw
I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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