Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
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