we have officially mastered the walk of shame
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
