Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.
The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
We got banned from that Whataburger for life. WHATABURGER. Which is saying something. They deal with drunk dumbasses every night.
Tequila happens.
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
Randomize
