we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
i would punch a child for taco bell
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
No stitches, just platelets and will power
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Randomize
