I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
You need a sexual gate keeper
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
Randomize
