It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
i just pissed myself at work. maybe they'll buy the old coffee spill trick
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
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