I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
Randomize
