the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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