i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
Just pee around me
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
Randomize
