Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
Randomize
