you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
Randomize
