porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
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