I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
Alive.
So much puke
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
You can't just leave with hair like that
Randomize
