You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
If Curt Schilling could pitch a game with that blood-filled sock... if Tiger Woods won the 2008 US Open with a torn ligament, then I'd be an embarrassment to the human race if I couldn't manage to at least jerk him off even if I was still crying after he put it in my butt.
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Randomize
