Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
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