can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
Randomize