My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
im having a threesome with these popsicles
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
You need a sexual gate keeper
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
I have so many feelings about this burrito
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
Randomize
