That reminds me...we need to get swords
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
So never has there been a greater Valentine's Day gift than you actually putting a new roll of toilet paper on for me after using the old roll up! You didn't even use the new roll. You clearly put that on from a gentleman's standpoint vs. a selfish standpoint. I love you!!!!
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
Randomize
