It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
Randomize
