47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
