im about as happy as oj after his trial
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
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