I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
jump out the window naked night went bad
Randomize