Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
Randomize
