Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
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