Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
Randomize
