I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
mike has just informed me of all the things he would put in his pussy if he was a woman. this includes door stops, power drills & g.i. joes.
"and then my dad would be all like 'hey mike, where's the remote?'"
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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