I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
Cover your peen. We're going out.
My life has come down to me literally sitting on an uncrustables trying to defrost it because I’m drunk alone and hungry.
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Randomize
