I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Randomize
