the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
I think a kid would responsible me up
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
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