What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
Randomize
