I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
dude, i look like john mccains neck right now
Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Randomize
