Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
If you don't answer the phone then I will be forced to leave you a wonderful voicemail of me throwing up
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
It's official drugs can't kill me
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
