So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
Randomize
