At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
Randomize
