But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
