You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
Randomize
