hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
Randomize
