just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
Randomize
