Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
I would fuck him just for his dog
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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