paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
You've changed since you got that strap on
Randomize