I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
Randomize
