I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
So I'm eating my burger minding my own business, when the guy next to me starts up a conversation. Seemed normal at first, stocks, bonds, etc...then he said...and I quote "I can push a bowling-ball up a flight of stairs with my tongue." As I awkwardly laughed he broke out "I bet you I could bite the head off of a rabbit."
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize
