Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
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