Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
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