And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
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