and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
Randomize
