Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
Randomize
