Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
She's going to get me a sippy cup for christmas. If I can't open it, I can't have any more to drink. Seem reasonable?
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize