i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
Randomize
